Broken. Beautiful. Redeemed.

I am a sinner by default.  I edit my settings daily in a vain attempt to be more polished and presentable, but at the end of the day, I revert back to my default setting and my idle work is erased.  Thank God, He covers over my errors and mistakes, literally whiting out my blotted ink stains of sin.  God is not just the editor of my story, but the author of my story, and every story.  He is writing something so incredibly beautiful that our human minds cannot begin to fathom His great unfolding. 

As I reread the story of my life up until this moment, it can be difficult, sometimes impossible, to comprehend how God can use the material for His great story.  What could He do with the rags of my messy past?  Why would He want to dirty His hands with it?  Can He really use my pain and suffering for good?  Could He really turn my sin and selfishness into His glory?

The good news is that the answer is “Yes!”  He can and will create beauty from the ashes of my past.  He is not afraid to get dirty.  He can and is using my pain and suffering for good.  And he absolutely will turn my sin and selfishness into His glory.  How, you ask?  Through redemption.

I am broken.  I have deep wounds from traumas.  I have been abused, used, mistreated, abandoned, and discarded by people.  I engaged in sin, over and over again, in a cycle of guilt and shame that I could not break.  I desperately sought to find love and belonging through sex, through success at work, and through every type of relationship.  I manipulated others to feel control and power.  I selfishly discarded people and their feelings.  I even sinned against my own body. 

I am beautiful.  In God’s eyes, I am His precious daughter.  I am beautiful in His sight.  I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14).  He doesn’t see me as the sinner that I am.  He sees me through the lens of pure, unconditional agape love. 

I am redeemed.  Through all my selfish sins, my painful traumas, and my rebellious youth, God was there.  He waited patiently for me to come to Him.  Ultimately, my own sin drew me back to relationship with God.  As I slowly began to surrender my stubborn will to His, redemption followed.  He covered over each and every one of my sins with the healing blood of Jesus’ sacrifice (John 3:16).  Because of Christ’s sacrifice, I no longer have to live in the shame and guilt of my past. 

I am broken.  I am beautiful.  I am redeemed.